_{Full Buck (naked) Moon:}

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Bonjour Bloom Community! This weekly newsletter is an invitation to be mindful of the ways your current lifestyle and prior conditioning keeps you feeling TOO TIRED, TOO BUSY, OR FEELING TOO GUILTY/ASHAMED to nurture more pleasure.

We are building a community of women committed to finding the time to prioritize themselves and push back on the conditioning of self sacrifice. The scientific data is there that pleasure supports your emotional, physical, and mental well-being. So, let’s get to this week’s newsletter….

Feature Article

Getting Buck Naked under the Full Buck Moon

Hello Beautiful.  We are coming up on our next full moon on July 21 6:17 a.m. Eastern Standard Time (10:17 a.m GMT).  I don’t know about you but looking up at the dark sky on a clear night to see the luminescent moon, in whatever phase she is in (yes, I give her a feminine pronoun because she is divine feminine to me, like Mother Earth) is definitely one of my daily or at least weekly pleasures.

I used to love waiting for the full moon each month and even had a full moon women’s gathering, for years, to celebrate the full moon in community with friends. We sat in circle outside as often as the weather permitted in the Midwest.

But, even if we assembled inside during the winter months, we always had part of our ceremony take place outside, where we each were ready to burn up little slips of paper with words that contained our fears and/or disappointments from that month.  Then, we took turns in a circle as we publicly or silently set these declarations on fire and watched them burn to ashes.  

If you don’t have a fire pit and are intrigued with this ceremony (for yourself or with a group of girlfriends), an iron skillet works well as the container for our literal and symbolic “burning and letting go” ceremony. We usually took the cooled ashes the following day and mixed them with the earth around a tree or in a garden.

Mother Nature is a great recycler of dead/rotting organic matter that over time becomes a nourishing compost to enrich the soil.

Did you know that each of the monthly full moons has a name or several names?  These full moon names date back to Native Americans, of what is now the northern and eastern United States.  This month is called the Full Buck Moon that describes the new antlers of buck deer that push out from their foreheads, in coatings of velvety fur. 

Our challenge to you dear reader, is to celebrate this Full Buck Moon by walking around “buck” naked for any length of time in your bedroom by yourself, in front of a partner, or even outside (gasp!) under the night sky if it is safe to do so. 

I will be at my campsite during the full moon and plan to spend a few minutes after the rest of the campers around me go to bed, sitting in my screen room, listening to the sounds of the evening while taking in the beauty of the full moon. 

Of course my collection of crystals will be out on my deck soaking up the full moon energy! I will also have a sarong that is perfect to use if I need to quickly conceal my birthday suit.

We suggest this “getting naked” practice to begin feeling more comfortable with your body without covering it up.  If you have been around babies or have young children/grandchildren you notice that they do not have a natural shame about being naked.  In fact, many relish the feeling and run around the house with a big smile on their face.

Part of reclaiming your personal power comes from recognizing the conditioning that has been passed down from your parents and grandparents (and society) that shames us for being naked or enjoying being naked. 

This shame is deeply soft wired into our nervous systems.  It is also a big reason that more sexual pleasure is not available to you if you struggle with feelings of shame regarding your body, your body parts, or getting naked.

In order to become more comfortable with your body, try taking longer amounts of time (each of us will be different) before putting your clothes on after you shower or take a bath.  

This could range from 10 seconds (1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi, etc.) to 10 minutes for most of us.  And it is totally normal to feel your pulse quicken and perhaps a tightness in your solar plexus before you cave in and put on a robe, clothes, sweats, or PJ’s.  

But, congratulate yourself for trying something that is helping to rewire your nervous system (more on the steps to rewire your nervous system in future Bloom editions).  Tell yourself that you are safe. Remind yourself that nothing bad happened.  Maybe even journal about your experience and reactions to this exercise.  

Perhaps you can’t even do this exercise because it feels “too much”, uncomfortable or stupid.  You are not an outlier. In a study done in 2018 by Keon West, involving 697 subjects, 40% of the study participants answered that they don’t enjoy being naked alone (reference for the study at the end of this newletter).

I invite you to ask yourself why does it feel too much, uncomfortable or stupid? The answer most likely is unconscious conditioning from childhood. I love the quote by the psychologist Carl Jung, who once said

And, If the idea of getting totally naked for a short period of time seems overwhelming to your nervous system (e.g., grew up in a strict religious community, experienced sexual abuse, experienced prior shame for the shape of your body, you feel uncomfortable looking at your naked body in a mirror, etc.) maybe try baby steps:

You could remove your bra and try wearing a just a loose tank top with panties as your first step. You could wear a silky robe with nothing underneath and let the front open up “just a little” as you walk around your bedroom.

You can wear a long (or short) skirt and go “commando” during the day (my favorite in the summer). Or you could turn off all the lights and sit on your bed for a few minutes where no one can “see” you naked.

Be creative, open, and curious. And above all else, listen to and connect with your body, not just physically but the voice of your body that sends you messages all the time if you learn to slow down, get quiet, and listen. Try to go past your Comfort Zone to that next zone of Discomfort….for just a bit of time.

Then, offer yourself lots of positive praise for having the courage to try something that scares you as you reclaim your right to celebrate yourself and your body.

Celebrating can rewire your brain by releasing neurotransmitters that make you feel good, which can increase your motivation and satisfaction. When you celebrate, your brain releases dopamine, which is associated with pleasure and reward. 

This neurotransmitter sends signals to other neurons that create a pleasurable reward, and the neurons that fire together start to get wired together in your brain. 

Your brain also pays attention to what you did to deserve the reward, including calculating what's needed to repeat that action and achieve your goals. 

More Support on Nakedness

Want some more support to befriend your body?

S4Ep1: From Shame to Sexual Pleasure with Laura Bogush. This episode highlights how Laura overcame her feelings of shame regarding her aging, plus-sized body and it involved getting naked with other women in a safe space. Now, she creates safe spaces for other women and her wide range of offerings include online classes that don’t require any nudity.

AND Laura and I will have an online Question & Answer session for our newsletter community on Wednesday, September 11, 2024 at 6-7 p.m. CDT, 7-8 p.m. EDT, 4-5 p.m. PDT, & 9-10 a.m. September 12th AEDT (Sydney, Australia)

Hit reply to this newsletter and I’ll send you the Zoom link to join us.

S4Ep3: Rewriting Your Sexual Story with Nadia Lune (COMING SOON release date 8/8/24) is an episode with fellow sex coach Nadia Lune. We talk about our experience two years ago at our coaching retreat in Costa Rica with 90 other women and how getting naked in front of other women was very healing for feelings of body shame.

Podcast and Blog of Miranda at Live Free Creative Company

Thanks for reading this week’s edition. We would love to hear from you regarding your reactions to this issue, the suggestions or your experience actually trying the challenge. Just hit reply, and let me know what you think or how you feel. I’m definitely interested 😀